Monthly Archives: March 2008

Once upon a time, there was a President named Bill Clinton. President Clinton had a Vice-President named Al Gore. Al was kind of a shy guy. Never spoke much, or did anything. He was just waiting around for Bill to get impeached so that he could become the world�s biggest under-achiever. This made President Clinton sad, so he and his staff would play with the thermostat in Al�s office during the summer and winter. During these times, the Presidents staff would walk back and forth, wiping their brows with hankies and mumbling about something called global warming. Pretty soon, Al started noticing that a lot of the staffers were wearing shorts in the winter and began to formulate an idea. He figured that if it were hot enough in January to wear shorts, then there must really be a problem with the sky. So Al rushed into the Senate chambers and cried �The Sky is Warming, The Sky is Warming! Most of the Senators were shocked to even find out that Al could talk, let alone cry out in concern. So, the Senators, wondering where they were going to blow their budget that year, gave a whole bunch of money…

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Obama gave a speech on his economic plans this morning that consisted of six principles that �should guide the legal reforms needed to establish a 21st century regulatory system.� He called John�McCain�s economic plan as something that �amounts to little more than watching this crisis happen. �While this is consistent with Senator McCain�s determination to run for George Bush�s third term, it won�t help families who are suffering, and it won�t help lift our economy out of recession,� he said. Tucker Bounds, McCain campaign spokesman issued the following statement on Mr. Obama�s speech: �No amount of rhetoric can hide Senator Obama�s clear record of embracing the liberal tax and spend, big government policies that hit hardworking American families at a time when they�re most vulnerable, and are certain to move America backward.� McCain would take over for the current’ administration’s policy of Borrow and Spend, which is even worse, considering that eventually that debt has to be paid back plus interest.� So yes, “tax” and spend is a far more responsible way of getting things done. Hillary Clinton had this to say about John McCain’s economic plans: �Sometimes the phone rings at 3 a.m. in the White House and it�s…

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While the Bush III candidacy starts reving up to tell us how good things are going in Iraq, we reached another terrible milestone over the weekend with #4000 of our troops dead.� To make matters worse, it looks as though Moqtada al-Sadr’s cease fire is coming to an end, as battles with the Mahdi Army erupt all over Iraq. “The cease-fire is over; we have been told to fight the Americans,” said one Mahdi Army militiaman, who was reached by telephone in Sadr City. This same man, when interviewed in January, had stated that he was abiding by the cease-fire and that he was keeping busy running his cellular phone store. Way back in 2002, I posted a song by Chumbawamba called Jacob’s Ladder (Not in My Name), which wound its way thoughout the Internet as a protest to this Unilateral war.� I thought today would be�a good time to repost it. Jacob’s Ladder (Not in My Name) Jacob�s ladder Like the Sermon on the mountain says dumber got dumb Hellfire and brimstone swapped for oil and guns When we�re pushing up daisies we all look the same In the name of the Father, maybe, but not in my name…

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Christ was watching down from heaven one day and didn�t like what he saw going on in America. So, he decided to make a trip to New York as its people had suffered greatly on 9-11. He appeared in Times Square since it seemed to be the most populist place in the city. As he looked around him, he saw the people bustling about, being rude to each other, and staring at someone named the Naked Cowboy. Christ proceeded to cross the street to get to the elevated traffic standard where he could speak to the most people. As he crossed the street, he was stopped by a cop who threatened to site him for jay-walking and attempting to climb a traffic standard. Christ proceeded to bless the officer and laid his hands on him to cure his unknown lung cancer. The officer, feeling threatened spun Christ around and slapped the handcuffs on him for attacking an officer. At the precinct Christ was placed in a cell with a group of drunks and addicts. As he slowly made his way around the cell, he touched each one and forgave them of their sins. He also healed them all of their…

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May God bless you and keep us all on this, the holiest day in Christianity. May we remember those lives who were wasted to protect us from nothing. May we remember those who suffer, crippled and maimed in the hospitals for nothing. May we be kind to the people on the street who have lost all hope and are living hand to mouth. And may the Card carrying Nazi of a pope have something more to say than give money or go to hell. Remember when Easter was all lilies, candy and the Easter Bunny? We’ve all grown up and lost our innocence, and at what cost? I think it might be a good day to listen to John Lennon’s song ‘Imagine’. Hug your Grand Children today. They are our last hope.

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The headlines scream �THE ECONOMY WILL REBOUND IN 2009?. Let�s see, by my last count, the price of Gas is predicted to be somewhere around $4.00 a gallon this summer, and already is in some areas. Manufacturing is not going to increase, unless it is a war related business. The service sector, which is pretty much all we have left, is shrinking, due to higher food and ingredient prices to make the food, and the fuel to carry it. The stock market, which by the way, means squat to the average consumer is being propped up by the fed�s, who themselves are already broke. They are, as we speak, printing paper money 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Banks are failing. It is predicted that the housing market AKA foreclosures won�t stabilize for up to 3 years. So, tell me, dear readers, how are things going to rebound in 2009?

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