Posts Tagged ‘ Tattlesnake ’

The Tattlesnake — Was Donald Trump Born in Jamaica, South Africa or Mexico?

April 20, 2011
By
The Tattlesnake — Was Donald Trump Born in Jamaica, South Africa or Mexico?

Now there seems to be some question about Donald Trump’s birthplace. (That those questions were apparently invented out of thin air, possibly for humorous reasons, is of no consequence.) As we know from the example of the right-wring media, any question involving your place of birth must be answered by a slew of legal documents which they will then reject as forgeries and demand more, just as Trump, to goose up his pathetic TV show’s ratings with a presidential bid, is demanding that Obama release his ‘long form’ birth certificate since the short form, adequate for obtaining a US passport or entering the military, just isn’t enough for the blubbery mass of ham and ego some call “The Donald.” Consider this: Not one person at the Jamaica, New York, hospital where Trump claims to have been born remembers his birth, as far as I care to find out. Aside from that, Trump’s alleged ‘real’ birth certificate doesn’t specify it is a hospital in Jamaica ‘New York’ — it simply says “The Jamaica Hospital.” What is Trump trying to pull here, MON? Was he born in the islands and smuggled into dis country? And where are the contemporaneous 1946 newspaper birth…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Political Short Cuts Part Deux Edition

April 9, 2011
By

More short sour snipes at some prominent political and media figures of our bloated Blutocracy, in no particular order. WI Supreme Court Justice David Prosser – Proudly relying on a former underling and ardent GOP activist to discover more than enough ‘accidentally uncounted’ votes two days after losing the election to miraculously make him the victor, Prosser has shown himself to be in the same league of unembarrassed conservative judicial giants as Antonin Scalia and Clarence Thomas. No doubt if there is ever again a Republican president haunting the White House, Prosser will be at the top of his or her list of US Supreme Court nominees, eclipsed only by the fine legal minds of Scooter Libby, Louie Gohmert and Orly Taitz. Ann Coulter - Anorexic in appearance; emaciated in thought; bulimic in speech. In other words, she never changes. Mike Huckabee - His Christian devotion to integrity would be breathtaking to behold at some point in the future. As it is, we just have to take his assurance that he follows the teachings of Jesus on faith, as no independent evidence exists to confirm this assertion. President Barack Obama – Apparently content to advance through constant retreat which, if…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake — Wordy-Gurdy Name Quiz

March 24, 2011
By

Just for fun, grab a pencil and paper and try to find the three-word name combinations of prominent people in politics, history and the arts from each clue. Example: Clue: Hit the road, Congressman Name: Ray Charles Rangel 1. Clue: Piano Man Sun-Tanned 2. Clue: Shrugged the Aqua Buddha Senator 3. Clue: Blond-Haired De-Angler 4. Clue: Offbeat Comedian Astroturfer 5. Clue: Code Pink Prime Israeli 6. Clue: Disaster Progressive News Anchor 7. Clue: Chess Records’ Okie Senator At Last 8. Clue: Enthusiasm Curbed Tea Party Billionaire 9. Clue: Oscar General Badger Governor 10. Clue: Traitor for Gold and Golden Bear Musclehead Answers below

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Defending Charlie Sheen Edition

March 12, 2011
By

Is it crazy to stand up to corporations and media parasites that are trying to tell you how to live your life? Charlie Sheen’s gotten a bum rap from the media lately because he refused to play the corporate and tabloid-TV game: the Shamed Celebrity is supposed to enter rehab and emerge contrite and chastened and just so gleefully grateful his corporate employer stuck by him during his time of need. Instead, Sheen called CBS and his producers on their ‘we care’ bullshit, and told the media hypocrites that parasitically cover celebrities to stuff it where the moon don’t shine. Here’s a news flash you won’t see on the MSM: When celebs enter rehab, it’s mainly for PR, career, or project-insurance purposes and there is no shortage of drugs and alcohol at any of the well-known rehab ranches that cater to the famous. What are they going to do, kick them out and lose all of that money? No, they turn a blind eye and cooperate in the fraud that the celebrity is ‘cured,’ and everybody goes home happy. Charlie Sheen just refused to indulge in this fetid game and, for that, he should be applauded. Is he crazy? Maybe,…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Top Ten Neocon Republican Hits Edition

March 2, 2011
By

These top ten lists get tedious, and this one’s no different. 1. “This Land Ain’t Your Land, This Land Is MY Land” Scotty and the Koch Brothers 2. “America The Profitable” Moe Greenback and the Wall Streeters 3. “Take Your Job And Shove It” The U.S. Chamber of Commerce 4. “Dead Man’s Curve” Chris Christie and the Budget Cutters 5. “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling” The Palin Family Choir 6. “Viva Low Wages!” Wal Mart and the New Peasants 7. “It’s My Party And I’ll Cry If I Want To” Long John Boehner and the Wailers 8. “Liar, Liar (Pants On Fire)” Mike Huckabee and the Birthers 9. “He Got The Gold Mine And I Got the Shaft” Glenn Beck’s Suckers 10. “(Here It Comes Your) 19th Nervous Breakdown” Michele Bachmann and her Teabaggers ©2011 RS Janes. LTSaloon.org.

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Jon Stewart Interviews Hermann Goering Edition

February 24, 2011
By

STEWART: My guest tonight served as Adolf Hitler’s air force chief and one of his closest advisors — let’s welcome to the program former German Reichsmarshall Hermann Goering! (They shake hands and sit down while the audience applauds.) Let me just say, sir, thanks for being here, and you look pretty damn good for a man over one hundred years old who supposedly died in 1946! What is that – Oil of Olay or Botox or something?! GOERING: Ha, ha! Goodness gracious, no! I never died, I just moved to Argentina! I also lied about my age to get in the military and have taken good care of myself in my old age! And it’s amazing what modern medicine can do! Ha, ha! STEWART: Goodness gracious?!? What – is this a 4-H Club convention?! GOERING: Ha, ha! Millions of good solid Americans from the heartland of the country talk like that, Jon! STEWART: Oh, yeah, and out on the coasts all we do is yell ‘m**her-f**ker’ and ‘go for the gay’! GOERING: (Grinning) You said it, I didn’t! STEWART: In your book, you say the Nazis were misunderstood. You say they had doubts about everything they did. You were one…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Post-It Notes From the Underground Part One Edition

February 17, 2011
By

Watch out, he’s petting his peeves again! Messages scribbled on Post-It Notes that were giving me a brain-ache until I wrote them down. Note to Abraham Lincoln, wherever he is now: It’s just as well you’re not around today. The idea that Haley “Yazoo City” Barbour and Rick “Secesh” Perry are Republicans would no doubt give you severe apoplexy followed by a fatal stroke anyway. Note to George Washington, wherever he is now: Good thing you’re not around, either, to see this 21st century bobblehead-doll America where a good portion of the politicians and electorate, abetted by the dumbed-down corporate media, have forgotten how to read, especially where the Constitution and the Bible are concerned. Note to Arianna Huffington: A quote from Balzac seems appropriate: “Behind every great fortune there is a great crime.” Take a couple of million from the $315 mil you got from AOL and throw a few bucks at all the people who worked for free to make your website worth selling. BTW, I can’t find even one person who thinks your AOL merger is a good idea or cares to read your website again. Prediction: the AOL-Huff Post is toast. Note to Clarence Thomas: What…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – New Definitions from the Askewed Dictionary Edition

February 14, 2011
By

Glimpses Behind the Curtain of Our Blutocracy “Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell, no!” – Sen. John “Bluto” Blutarsky, from the film “Animal House” (1978). BACHMANNALIA: 1. The sound wild-eyed gibberish makes in a rubber room. 2. An election-year holiday celebrating the unity of corporate money and gullible voters with sensibilities as squishy as wet teabags. 3. A sexless outdoor orgy in Minnesota in mid-winter, the quintessential Republican idea of how the public should be treated. BACHMANNLINESS: 1. Putting on your ‘man pants’ backwards, while staring at the wrong camera. 2. Having the balls to misquote the Constitution on national television. BLUTOCRACY: 1. A plutocracy as operated by Sen. John Blutarsky, the fictional ‘Bluto’ character from the film “Animal House,” and those who are likeminded. 2. The USA today, and not the newspaper. 3. Wall Street week. BOEHNALITY: 1. Crocodile tears shed by one who is only half-crocked. 2. Pretending you’re in control of something you plainly are not, such as a bus when the steering wheel has come off in your hand. 3. The illusion that you stand for anything beyond your own personal gain and your…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – “Finally We Are Free!” Edition

February 12, 2011
By

Title quote via MSNBC from a pro-democracy demonstrator celebrating in Cairo’s Tahrir (Liberation) Square following the resignation of Egyptian dictator Hosni Mubarak, Feb. 11, 2011. The US media reported yesterday that Hosni Mubarak had finally resigned, the message conveyed to the world by his Vice President and Torturer-in-Chief, Omar Suleiman. Of course, the pro-democracy demonstrators wildly celebrated Mubarak’s resignation – think of it: in 18 days they had toppled a tyrant without resorting to violence, even in the face of provocation from Mubarak’s street thugs and vicious secret police — but I also thought it was interesting that Hosni is now ensconced in his estate on the Red Sea, surrounded by razor wire and heavily guarded. Some may interpret this arrangement as protecting Mubarak’s corrupt hide, but it could also be seen as a prison from which he could be quickly transferred to a jet bound out of the country, forced into exile by the praetorian guard now ‘protecting’ him from his own people. Then again, perhaps they are merely holding the deposed dictator for trial – the people have demanded Hosni be held responsible for his brutal reign, and they want to know where all the money went. In…

Read more »

The Tattlesnake – Political Short Cuts Edition

February 9, 2011
By

Brief sour snipes at some prominent political and media figures of our bloated Blutocracy, in no particular order. Michele Bachmann – When scary met rally. Arianna Huffington – A mythological Greek goddess who prospers greatly on the free labor of others. Tim Pawlenty – A polite little Minnesota fart desperately trying to become a big Republican shit. Sarah Palin – America’s trademarked Tweetheart, soon to be our ‘Dear Tweeter’ right after the Republicans in Congress succeed in outlawing rational thought entirely. Jon Stewart - If Jon noticed two brown-shirted men wearing swastika armbands beating up another man laying on the ground, he would immediately condemn onlookers who pointed out any similarities to the Nazis, and go on to make the case that the actions of the attackers and the man trying to defend himself are equally deplorable. Then he’d giggle and cut to a commercial for Verizon Wireless. The Tea Partiers – Their hearts are in the Right place — next to a pile of cash in a bank vault owned by the Koch brothers. Comcast/MSNBC - ‘Lean Forward’ so it’ll be easier to kick your ass out the door if you displease the parent company. Bill O’Reilly – Joe…

Read more »

Enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email.

Join 9 other subscribers