“A liberal is a man [or woman] who is right most of the time, but he’s right too soon.”
— Gregory Nunn

“A liberal is a socialist with a wife and two children.”
— Author Unknown

“A liberal man is too broad-minded to take his own side in a quarrel.”
— Robert Frost

“A liberal is a conservative who has been arrested.”
— Thomas Wolfe

“Every American is a liberal when harassed by the police, thrown in jail, prosecuted in court, out of a job, or denied a right. Conservatism is an indulgence for those who think none of that will ever befall them.”
— Richard Sherricky

“Liberals can understand everything but people who don’t understand them.”
— Lenny Bruce

“Liberalism, above all, means emancipation — emancipation from one’s fears, his inadequacies, from prejudice, from discrimination… from poverty.”
— Hubert H. Humphrey

“The principle feature of American liberalism is sanctimoniousness. By loudly denouncing all bad things — war and hunger and date rape — liberals testify to their own terrific goodness. More important, they promote themselves to membership in a self-selecting elite of those who care deeply about such things. It’s a kind of natural aristocracy, and the wonderful thing about this aristocracy is that you don’t have to be brave, smart, strong or even lucky to join it, you just have to be liberal.”
— P.J. O’Rourke

“Whenever conservatives describe liberals, they always first invent a rigid, dogmatic, self-righteous caricature, and then ascribe fatuous, ignorant and stupid notions to their creation. When finished, they fail to comprehend they have just defined the darkest side of conservatism rather than liberalism.”
— Stephen O’Toure

“The Liberal State is a mask behind which there is no face; it is a scaffolding behind which there is no building.”
— Benito Mussolini

“Why is it that right-wing bastards always stand shoulder to shoulder in solidarity, while liberals fall out among themselves?”
— Yevgeny Yevtushenko

“Left-wingers are incapable of conspiring because they are all egomaniacs.”
— Norman Mailer

“My objection to Liberalism is this — that it is the introduction into the practical business of life of the highest kind — namely, politics — of philosophical ideas instead of political principles.”
— Benjamin Disraeli

“The liberal holds that he is true to the republic when he is true to himself. (It may not be as cozy an attitude as it sounds.) He greets with enthusiasm the fact of the journey, as a dog greets a man’s invitation to take a walk. And he acts in the dog’s way too, swinging wide, racing ahead, doubling back, covering many miles of territory that the man never traverses, all in the spirit of inquiry and the zest for truth. He leaves a crazy trail, but he ranges far beyond the genteel old party he walks with and he is usually in a better position to discover a skunk.”
— Elwyn Brooks White

“I am also very proud to be a liberal. Why is that so terrible these days? The liberals were liberators — they fought slavery, fought for women to have the right to vote, fought against Hitler, Stalin, fought to end segregation, fought to end apartheid. Liberals put an end to child labor and they gave us the five-day work week! What’s to be ashamed of?”
— Barbra Streisand

“The essence of the Liberal outlook lies not in what opinions are held, but in how they are held: instead of being held dogmatically, they are held tentatively, and with a consciousness that new evidence may at any moment lead to their abandonment.”
— Bertrand Russell

“A liberal is a power worshipper without the power.”
— George Orwell