“How many observe Christ’s birthday! How few his precepts!
O! ’tis easier to keep holidays than commandments.”
— Benjamin Franklin, Poor Richard’s Almanack, 1757.

“So in everything, do unto others what you would have them do unto you, for this sums up the law and the Prophets.”
— Jesus, Matthew 7:12, KJV.

“And why ye call me, Lord, Lord, and do not the things which I say?”
— Jesus, Luke 6:46, KJV.

“Jesus wasn’t a Christian, and he never preached in a church. He was also a drinker, and liked to hang out with sinners. We think of him very highly in the Church of Stop Shopping. We put him right up there with Lenny Bruce.”
— Reverend Billy

“Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God.”
— Lenny Bruce

“God wanted to take a vacation, so He asked St. Peter for suggestions on where to go. ‘Why not go to Jupiter?’ asked St. Peter. ‘No, too much gravity, too much stomping around,’ said God. ‘Well, how about Mercury?’ ‘No, it’s too hot there.’ ‘Okay,’ said St. Peter, ‘what about Earth?’ ‘No,’ said God, ‘They’re such horrible gossips. When I was there 2000 years ago, I had an affair with a Jewish woman, and they’re still talking about it.'”
— Author Unknown

“Going to church doesn’t make you a Christian anymore than going to the garage makes you a car.”
— Dr. Laurence J. Peter

“Christianity [in America] is not a religion; it’s an industry.”
— Author Unknown

“There is no point in saying that one should not doubt or one should believe. Just to say ‘I believe’ does not mean that you understand and see… To force oneself to believe and to accept a thing without understanding is political, and not spiritual or intellectual.”
— Walpola Rahula, “What the Buddha Taught.”

“I still say a church steeple with a lightning rod on top shows a lack of confidence.”
— Doug McLeod

“God has no religion.”
— Mohandas K. ‘Mahatma’ Gandhi

“If God lived on earth, people would break his windows.”
— Jewish Proverb

“God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh.”
— Voltaire

“When I do good, I feel good; when I do bad, I feel bad, and that is my religion.”
— Abraham Lincoln

“With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion.”
— Steven Weinberg

“Men never do evil so completely and cheerfully as when they do it from a religious conviction.”
— Blaise Pascal

“Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal that has the True Religion — several of them. He is the only animal that loves his neighbor as himself and cuts his throat if his theology isn’t straight.”
— Mark Twain

“The three great apostles of practical atheism, that make converts without persecuting, and retains them without preaching, are wealth, health and power.”
— Charles C. Colton

“For among my people are found wicked men;
they lay wait, as he that setteth snares; they set
a trap, they catch men.
As a cage is full of birds, so are their houses
full of deceit: therefore they are become great,
and waxen rich.
They are waxen fat, they shine: yea, they
overpass the deeds of the wicked: they judge
not the cause, the cause of the fatherless, yet
they prosper; and the right of the needy do
they not judge.
Shall I not visit for these things? saith the
Lord: shall not my soul be avenged on such
a nation as this?”
— Jeremiah 5:26-29, KJV.