Washington, D.C., February 14th, 2012- Early this morning a White House intern claimed he heard John the big BOENER crying at the bottom of a tree, below the Tree House of Little Else but Compromise built by the Obama administration over the past 3 years.

“But he PROMISED he’d compromise with ME first, compromise himself right out of the White House! Now he’s up there compromising with Mitch the B%$#CH! Maybe they’re interested in a threesome?”

And with a huff, and a puff and a little baby whine he climbed up.

NEWSFLASH! Early this morning Mitch and John were found, up in a tree, KISSING, a tar baby, ironically made by the all the racist folks in the Republican Party. Or should Scribe have rephrased that as just, “The racist Republican Party?”

Below the tree was Glen Beck doing his fake crying routine, saying, “But he promised me! He promised me! I HAVE SENSELESS, MEANINGLESS, CHARTS TO PROVE HE PROMISED ME!” But no one saw him there. No one cared. Because no one with an ounce of intelligence pays attention to Glen Beck anymore.

Meanwhile, Ricky InSanitorium was reported to have said, “Oh, sickening, how perverted. You two together on a tar baby? Come over to my house: we’ll cure your gayness and have you kicking our dead fetus over the goal post in no time.”

Ah, except that last part, twere somewhat of a pleasant dream for Scribe to wake up from on VD day, tweren’t it? Now it’s time to go back to compromise almost every damn time while going out of your way to insult your base reality.

SIGH.